My Story....
My Testimony

When I had my first child in 1994, I was completely overwhelmed by the tremendous, unconditional love I felt for my newborn daughter. Having complete intentions of returning to my full-time career, my world suddenly changed in more ways that I expected. I soon knew there was no way I could leave her every day in someone else's care. I had to be with her - no matter what.

Quitting a job and the income it brings can be difficult for most new families. It certainly was for ours. I knew that if I was going to stay at home that I had to look for alternative ways to bring in an income. I began soliciting for freelance work in my area of expertise, which was public relations and desktop publishing. Money was very tight, but I was at home with my daughter.

After about six months of doing freelance work, I began looking for networking and support for home-based working moms. I did not find any type of organization or association, so the idea for Home-Based Working Moms (HBWM.com) was born. I've spent the past nine years building, developing and growing my home business to its current nationally-recognized status featured in numerous national publications and media outlets.

I was driven by a desire for a better future and for security in my life. Growing up, I had lost my father to suicide when I was 13. My mom raised three kids on a modest income and could not afford to put us through college. With my drive for a better life, I put myself through college with the help of loans and grants. After getting my B.A., I received a full scholarship to attend graduate school overseas in Scotland. After graduating with my Master's degree, I was eager to be successful, independent and secure. 

In most people's eyes, I had found success. I was nationally recognized. I was at home raising my (now) two children while still earning an income. I was happily married. I had a wonderful network of family and friends that enriched my life. I was involved and active in my church. I was happy and all was well ….. I thought.

My world was turned upside down in May 2002. That was when I discovered my marriage of 14 years was over. The pain and turmoil that resulted was, at times, unbearable. I went into my marriage believing completely that we would never be divorced. I believed it wasn't an option to either of us. And I would never willfully choose to raise my children in a broken home. I loved my kids and valued my marriage covenant too much. I value family too much. I wanted and had "the white-picket fence life". I did and continue to strive to live by God's commands. However, the dream was shattered. My marriage did not survive. My heart was torn out and my world was turned upside down when I lost my dream of a happy family life and even worse, had to watch my kids mourn the loss of their daddy moving out. Some days, I didn't want to go on. If it weren't for my kids, I may have stayed in bed indefinitely. And if it were not for God, I surely would not have found the peace and joy that He has given me. It did not happen overnight. There was a definite mourning time, but the sun began to shine again in my world. I had hope again. I had unexplainable peace and joy. I went from the pit of despair with no hope to the highest mountaintop singing praises. Nothing had changed except that God's presence, comfort, peace and joy had replaced what had been taken from me. I felt completely restored. Something, I believe, that is only possible with God.

God is and has been my source of comfort, of peace, of satisfaction, of joy, of love, of security. Without Him, I cannot imagine what my life would be like. I've learned these lessons the hard way. God has become even more real to me because He was all I could cling to some nights. He has filled that hurt and void in my life.

Whether or not I should, I look back on my life and wonder if I could have done more in my marriage. Perhaps I focused too much on my children and my business and not enough on my husband? Perhaps I took our marriage a bit for granted and did not continue to nurture it the way I should have? Maybe? Maybe not? Still, I feel those are important questions to ponder for all of us. I don't want others to make the same mistakes I may have made. That's why I feel it is important to bring awareness about the different needs and roles we play as women. Working at home has been an enormous blessing to me. However, I also feel it is important to caution women about the possibility of life getting out of balance.

You may not be prone to neglecting your work, your relationships, your faith or yourself, but perhaps there is another area of your life that is not getting the attention it needs. My hope is that this awareness can provide some guidance and reminders about keeping all the areas of your life in balance. And when one area begins to be neglected even slightly that you recognize it and make needed adjustments.

My goal is to provide women with the tools, resources, motivation and information to create the life they truly want. I also want women to go forward with the dream of working at home with a complete and accurate picture of what it is like and being aware that children, spouses, faith, health, home, friends, etc. all need our attention. I want to help women find a healthy balance for all of these important things in our lives.

The other powerful lesson I learned during this time in my life is that God wants to be more in my life than just a couple of hours on Sunday morning. I was a Christian before my marriage ended and regularly attended church, but God was not fully the Lord of my life. I did not seek Him in decisions in my life. I was in control of my life or so I thought. Now, I know God desires to be in control of our lives. He created us to have a relationship with us. He loves us unconditionally without exception, and He desires us to love him with our whole heart. ("Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment." Matthew 22:37-38)

I know now that I cannot truly love God if I don't know Him. And to know Him, means that I need to spend time with Him daily. My life has been forever changed by His love, guidance, comfort, peace and presence.

I make a conscious effort to start each day with Him -- learning and preparing for my weekly Bible Study and spending time in prayer -- building and growing my relationship with Him. I also enjoy worshipping Him through my Christian praise music (Third Day, Chris Tomlin, Jeremy Camp, Casting Crowns & others). How do I find the time? I simply make the conscious choice to put God first. Before I begin working, I spend time with Him. My life has been richly blessed by His presence and I wait in expectation to see where He is going to work in my life and how He is going to use me to touch others for eternity. To me, there is no greater blessing than to be used by God and to see Him touching others through me. He is such a personal God. I continually pray that He will give me a heart that loves Him above all else. ("Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Matthew 6:33)

I wish I had gotten to know Him on a deeper level sooner. If you don't know Him, I pray that you will take the time right now, to accept Christ as your personal savior.

To accept Christ and receive His free gift of eternal life, you:
- Must recognize you are a sinner and you need a saving relationship with Jesus Christ.
- Must confess (agree with God about) your sins.
- Repent of your sins (turn from sin to God).
- Ask Jesus to save you by His grace.

Pray a prayer such as this:
"Dear Lord, I know that I am a sinner and have sinned against you. Please forgive me for those sins. I know that I need You and I believe that Your son Jesus Christ died on the cross and rose again so that I may be forgiven for my sins and spend eternity with You. I believe You are the only way. Please enter my heart Jesus. I want to give my life to You and live my life for You. Please save me and guide me. Thank You Lord. Amen"

If you have done this, you can be sure that you will spend eternity in Heaven. This free gift of salvation can never be taken away. Take steps to build a relationship with Christ. (See resources and devotionals on the side bar.) I can assure you that your life will never be the same. The blessings of knowing Him far outweigh anything this world can offer.

I pray for God's richest blessings for you and your family and may you be an instrument for His kingdom and His purposes on this earth. 

Loving Him,