My Testimony Part Two

November 2006

"The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy."
Psalm 126:3

This verse sums up the past year for me and my family. If you read "Part One" of my testimony, you know a few years ago my kids and I experienced great loss. During those dark and painful days, I clung to Romans 8:28 which says "in *all* things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." He promised He would bring good out of the pain my children and I suffered. 

Although I do not want to relive those dark and painful days, I am grateful for them. Grateful because it drew me closer to God. It created a more intimate, personal relationship with Him -- (something I value more highly than anything this world can provide). And I know it can never be taken from me. I know my God will never leave me nor forsake me -- and these truths were emblazoned on my soul during this time in my life. 

As I walked this path that had been laid out for me, God and I had a deep, sometimes painful, time of bonding because He was all I had. I cried. He comforted. I was afraid. He gave me security. I was downcast. He filled me with hope. I was uncertain. He gave me peace. I messed up. He forgave. I messed up again. He forgave again. 

As I look back now, I see so many of the ways God provided for me. Not only did God provide His presence, His peace, His comfort, His love, He provided in more tangible ways as well. Several months before this tragedy, God provided a wonderful person who quickly became my best friend. We just clicked. If there is such thing as a "soul sister" she is mine. I consider her family my family. I love them dearly. Little did I know that in a few short months after meeting her, I would need her so much. In the months ahead, she held me up when I could not hold myself up. She comforted me, encouraged me and even made me drink awful carrot shakes when I could not stomach eating a single thing. 

God provided a loving church home where the pastor's wife took a personal interest in helping me through this season. God also had nudged a lady in our neighborhood to start a Bible study a few months prior. I decided to give it a try and in the next several months, these ladies became like family. They who would pray for me, comfort me, love on me and help me with my kids when I needed it. One of the ladies, who became like a second mom to me, rushed over when she heard of my situation and rocked me like a baby as I sobbed uncontrollably on her lap.

God also provided the ability to continue to work from home and be with my children during this time. I can remember the worry and concern I had over our finances as a single mom. I was not sure how we would make it, and I knew that something had to change. I prayed about working outside the home or selling our home. Things I did not want but knew I had to be willing to let go of. 

I can remember how astonished I was when I got a call out of the blue from my CPA in the weeks ahead telling me I did not need to deduct that much from my check any longer as a single head of household. The amount? It was almost exactly -- to the penny -- what I needed to make our mortgage payment each month. 

As I continued to seek Him, I later felt led to start a fifth website which enabled me to reduce the financial stress even more and grow my income another 30%.

I believed His Word to be true and waited for Him to bring good out of what had happened. At times, I could not see it. I did not know where He was. Other times, I was overwhelmed at the ways He was working. I saw many great and amazing things happen in the lives of friends and neighbors who had witnessed God at work in my life. The peace and joy I had could not be explained outside of God's restoration. 

As a result, I saw one neighbor give his life to Christ and another neighbor recommit his life to Christ. I watched as a neighbor who had turned her back on God when she lost her brother, turn her life back to Christ. I witnessed a family one by one accept Christ, and each become involved in church and bible study. I saw a divorced friend find peace and joy again when she chose to heal her anger and bitterness towards her ex after many, many years. I witnessed other neighbors start going to church or attending Bible Study. I also saw my mom open her heart to Christ in a big way. Bottom line - God used this opportunity to make Himself real to me and many people in my life.

Living through these experiences taught me many things and brought me closer to Christ. I began to more fully trust Him and His promises. I began to see His Hand at work in so many ways. 

I believed God and His promises, and He did not fail me.
I believed He would restore me…… and He has.
I believed He would enable me to forgive my previous husband  …… and He has.
I believed He would enable me to find total contentment in Him .. and He has. 

After a season, I began to pray for a godly husband who loves God with all his heart. A man who would love me and my children as his own. A man with integrity, who values family and honors God with his life. A man who would respect and love me till death do us part. And yes, a man who is romantic.... and tall. :-) 

The answer did not come quickly (in my opinion) but God definitely did answer my prayer and delivered on ALL areas and then some! (My husband is 6'10")! I have the peace and assurance that Sam is the man God had and has for me. He gave me His assurance and peace as I (and we) prayed through our courtship. Neither of us wanted to proceed if we felt the slightest lack of peace in the decision. He gave us that peace. 

As we dated and became engaged, we both were committed to doing it God's Way and staying pure until our marriage day. We desired a marriage based on His principles and did not want to miss out on a single blessing He had for our marriage. 

We married June 10, 2006 and He did not let us down! We have such a deep love, trust and respect for each other that is based on the foundation of our faith in God. He is a BIG God. He is the only God and He still answers prayers! He has restored the years the locust had eaten ..... (AND THEN SOME!) He did deliver and He brought me through the valley to the mountaintop where I can't stop praising Him. 

On our aisle runner at our wedding, we had this verse: "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Thank you Jesus!

I pray God will never let me forget the freshness of His overwhelming love, peace and presence in my life. I pray to always be in awe of Him and how much He loves me. I am so in love with Him.

To GOD be *all* the praise and glory.

Believe God, claim His promises and trust Him completely. He wants us to give Him our pain, our worries and our hurts and allow Him to transform them into peace and joy. He is faithful! And He is capable of doing immeasurably more than we could ever hope for or imagine.

Over the Top in Love with Him,